In Sickness and Samba

Sometimes life throws us curve balls we never thought we would have to deal with, yet we find ourselves seemingly thrown onto a different path.  After a long journey of on and off illness, having a diagnosis of primary immunodeficiency was only the beginning.  My immune system is partially missing and not working right?  You wonder, how can that be?  I never pictured myself being diagnosed with a disease for which no cure exists.  I never pictures myself being my own nurse and having to give myself blood plasma infusions every six days for the rest of my life, or until a cure exists.  I never pictured myself as a person who would need to spend years on antibiotics to function "normally."  I never pictured myself as a person who has to take a ton of daily medications.  I never wanted to be a sick girl.

At least treatment does exist.  This treatment relies on the generosity of other people.  The thought that blood donors keep me alive and healthy every day of my life is a astounding thought sometimes.  I am touched by the generosity that gives me a chance at a quality of life.

It's funny how perspectives and life goals change when health becomes your main goal, your job.  While I'm never where I want to be, I finally am on a path to where I feel like I can have health, maybe even not require daily antibiotics to prevent an infection, the bane of my existence.  Sure, I can turn to my religion and social network, change my diet, exercise now that I feel better with treatment to have the energy to do so, get more sleep, try not to stress.  The list goes on and on.  However, of all things, one thing has really attached itself to my heart and helped me physically and mentally.  That, of all things I did not expect, was Brazilian Samba.  The music, sure, but, most of all, the dancing is where I have found sanctuary.  It has given me a gift of an outlet, a community, friendship.

What is your Samba?   Find something that you enjoy, that moves you, and stirs you from within.  Don't shelve it and put it on the back burner to get to someday in the future.  Do it now, and do it with all your heart.